Real Estate Teams - How to Reopen the Lines of Communication

Click stars to vote (left is low, right is high)

(7 votes, average: 4.57 out of 5)

 Loading ...

[?]
 Print This

By Marie G. McIntyre, Ph.D.

RISMEDIA, June 26, 2008-(MCT)-Q. Until two weeks ago, I had a nice working relationship with “Kate,” my administrative assistant. Then she suddenly stopped talking to me. Now she will ask only necessary business questions.

Kate is fine with everyone else in the office, but she won’t even look at me or say goodbye at the end of the day. When I ask if I’ve done anything to upset her, she says no.

I’ve tried small talk, but that only makes her clam up more. I have absolutely no idea why she’s acting this way. Any advice on getting her to open up? - Perplexed Manager

A. People who use the silent treatment are deeply afraid of conflict. Their actions clearly convey anger, but when asked what’s wrong, they invariably reply “nothing” in a frosty tone.

The target of this tactic faces an impossible dilemma: A problem clearly exists, but there’s no way to resolve it. Continued attempts to placate the passive-aggressive pouter will just reinforce the behavior. So the only way to end this silly game is to stop playing.

If Kate were a coworker, I’d say ignore her foolishness and go about your business. However, as her manager, you must put an end to this childish mime act.

For example: “Kate, I know you’re upset, but I have no idea why. If you’d like to tell me, I’ll be glad to discuss your concerns. But if not, we still need to communicate normally. So would you prefer to talk about the problem or just return to regular communication?”

If Kate still insists that nothing is wrong, simply say “That’s great. I’m glad to know everything’s OK.” Then drop the subject, resume your normal relationship, and ignore any pouting.

Kate’s sulky behavior should soon disappear. But if not, treat it like any other performance problem. Kate needs to learn that mature professionals don’t act out their feelings like 3-year-olds.

Marie G. McIntyre is a workplace coach and the author of “Secrets to Winning at Office Politics.”

© 2008, McClatchy-Tribune Information Services.

RISMedia welcomes your questions and comments. Send your e-mail to: realestatemagazinefeedback@rismedia.com.

For more real estate coaching tips and topics, see:

• The 4 Cornerstones of Agent Recruiting & Retention
  Good People See the Problem; Great People Figure It Out - 5 Essential Life Concepts  
  How Parents Can Seek a Better Career-Life Balance

Discussion Forum

Topic	Posts	Last Poster
Is Social Media Marketing Effective in Real Estate Industry?	3	katescape
The importance of Local.com to real estate agents	1	HItxt101
NEED AGENTS / & REFERRALS	45	DainaBurness
Ethical values in real estate business	2	ballyhoo
MLS exposure without paying the commissions!!	5	uniquepam
Ethics	2	garyfrimann
3 Point Digital Marketing Strategy and the Importance of the ‘Assist’	1	HItxt101
35% Referrals to Valley of the Sun - Arizona	1	k4homes
Inexpensive Real Estate Websites	5	ncarey
RisMedia Forum - What a Response!!!	1	mycondospot

Learn 5 Vital Concepts to becoming a Master at Online Marketing at Leadership Conference

RISMEDIA, August 29, 2008-In today’s technology driven world, online marketing is just one factor in the key to success. Many agents believe that having a website and subscribing to the lead generation school of thought is enough, but as most agents can attest, nothing’s happening.
Renwick Congdon, President & CEO, Imprev will facilitate the “5 Concepts […]