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RISMEDIA, April 9, 2009-For my birthday, my daughter took me to have my ears pierced. I know it’s hard to imagine a woman of my vintage not having her ears pierced, but it’s true. Not only that, but I was scared!

We went to a jewellery shop that does piercings. There was a guy buying an engagement ring…so sweet, and there were another few customers browsing. I sat in the piercing chair at the front of the store, and the woman, who had been doing this for twenty years, put dots on my ears so that we could determine if they were both the same. I was very nervous. She said that in all her years of doing this, they’d only had three fainters. I desperately didn’t want to be the fourth. Not like the time when I took my daughter to get her stitches out in the doctor’s office and I passed out. Even thinking about it makes me feel woozy.

And then came the moment of truth — the piercing gun came out. Okay, I can do this. I want to do this, I’m here, I am not going to faint. I closed my eyes and went to my happy place – thank goodness for my Yoga classes! I heard the needle leave its shell and felt it enter my ear, slight burn, it was over, just keep breathing, she was going to the other side. Meanwhile, one of the customers oozed, “Oh I didn’t know you did piercings here. It looks amazing. Does it hurt?” I didn’t respond, I was in the zone. My daughter explained, “She’s in her happy place.” I experienced the next needle in slow motion and then it was done! I opened my eyes, everyone in the entire place was looking at me, and I cried, not from pain but from joy and release. I felt empowered. There’s no stopping me now. It’s about time! I kissed my daughter and stared at my sparkly ears in the mirror.

What had I been waiting for? It was fine. It hardly hurt at all, and it was done! My thoughts immediately turned to emerald tear-drop earrings. I had to make up for lost time.

You’ve heard of the silver lining. Well, this is the ‘golden earring’. The gift in the golden earring is this message: What are you waiting for?

If you’re anything like me, you spend a lot of time waiting for the right moment, getting busy with all the other details in your life, putting the things that you really want to do on hold, or allowing fear, anxiety or doubt to stand in your way.

The piecing experience reminded me that it is our thoughts that can stand in our way and it is also our thoughts that have the ability to take us exactly where we want to go. When I went to get my ears pierced I was consumed with fear, but I focused on the idea that I really wanted to have my ears pierced. I could see myself wearing earrings. It was one of those moments, hair flowing, beach in the background, silver and turquoise earrings, tan. (I was probably thinner and younger as well). Yes, I have a very vivid imagination. In any case, I had made up my mind that I wanted to do this and I wasn’t going to allow my fear to stand in my way. I felt amazing after it was done. I want to replicate this feeling in other aspects of my life.

The golden earring reminds us to reach out and grasp our dreams. When we actively pursue the things we want to achieve in our lives, we afford ourselves an incredible sense of lightness, contentment and joy.

Jacqui Markowitz is the Director of Communications for Frame of Mind Coaching. You can reach her at