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Are You a ‘People Pleaser’ to a Fault? 4 Signs to Watch for

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RISMEDIA, April 28, 2008–Do you find yourself taking too much time with people you know are not committed to working with you? Or, do you feel like you are bothering people when you call them? This week Dr. Maya examines how to avoid “people pleasing” to the point where it hurts your business.

Q. Dear Dr. Maya: I often feel like my clients are running me around. The result is I don’t feel like I have a life of my own. What can I do about this?

A: It’s very common for most real estate professionals to have a “people pleasing” pattern.

Here are the signs to watch out for to let you know whether you may be falling into that pattern:

1. You find yourself wasting time with people that you thought were prospective clients, only to find out that they were not really committed to working with you.

2. You find it hard to speak “truth” to your clients. For example you find it hard to tell specifically how to price their home.

3. You take on clients that you know you shouldn’t. Your intuition is telling you that there is “trouble ahead.”

4. You find it hard to pick up the phone and call prospects and tell yourself, “I don’t want to bother anyone.”

If these signs sound familiar to you then you need to learn the concept of “win/win.”

As Dr. Stephen Covey says when you practice win-win, you are agreeing to only be in interactions in which both people win.

Here’s what you can expect as the results:

1. Your clients and colleagues will gain respect for you because you are finding respect for yourself.

2. You can expect to have better control of your own schedule. You will be clearly setting boundaries and defining when you are able to work and when you’re not.

3. You can expect to be more courageous in your prospecting. No longer will you be trying to please everyone you call. Rather, you will be coming from the mindset of, “I have something valuable to offer.”

Remember to respect yourself, set boundaries by deciding when you are going work and consider your services as a valuable offering, and you will find yourself surrounded by clients who are ready to do business. Good luck to you.

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